Vincent Browne in cracking form, taking on Klaus Masuch of the ECB.
Notice Masuch’s reaction, it starts with a sort of sneer as if he could just ignore the irritating insect in front of him but then he gets more and more uncomfortable as Browne presses his point. Its just a shame that not one of the other journalists pushed any member of the Troika over Browne’s claims that we don’t owe need to pay unsecured bond holders and that the reason for paying them back is just to keep other European banks from getting into financial difficulties. Not to mention the fact that we shouldn’t be shoring up a now defunct bank.
The telling point from the past couple of years is the lack of any serious investigative journalism into what happened to our financial institutions and into why we have to accept what the Troika tell us to do. We have been told that we have to pay back a debt, most of which the Irish public did not incur, without any good reason. Our major media organisations have fallen in behind our political leaders in telling us that we have pay back money that we don’t have. Our journalists have been silenced, apart from Browne and Fintan O’Toole, and they have been marginalised as being eccentric or too left-wing to be listened to. There is a major story to be written about the ties that bind journalism with politics in this country, unfortunately that story will not be written by any of our journalists. If it is written at all, it will be written by the historians looking back at this gombeen nation.
Here is kickoutthejam’s patent pending guide to the upcoming contest to find an occupant for the empty ghost estate in the Phoenix Park – social housing Ireland style.
Sean Gallagher
There are some well known facts about Gallagher – he’s bald and he lives in a Den. What isn’t so well known is the fact that he’s a former Fianna Fail party member, eh? Oh. Well, its not so well known that he’s a failed entrepreneur who has left quite a few debts in his time, whats that? Oh. Very well, few people know that Gallagher admires Denis O’Brien – tax exile, Moriarty Tribunal star and creator of untold misery, jobs, sorry? Oh. Ok then, what is definitely not so well known is why so many people have been hoodwinked by a media hound into thinking that we need a President that is going to create jobs. Gallagher will create one job – for himself with a very large pension at the end of it. He won’t be able to interfere in the economy thankfully, given his and Fianna Fail’s track record in that department. Why vote for him? Obvious, we need a slaphead as President, now if we could just find two mates for him we’d have the beginnings of another top rating RTE show. An Irish version of William Hague. Knows his way around brown envelopes. Has difficulty remembering stuff.
Michael D Higgins
Serial Galway man. I’ll resist the temptation to call him a gnome, when he is so obviously a fairy dispensing pixie dust, in Irish. Reminds me of this Randy Newman song. Has a long and proven track record of wittering on incessantly, regardless of the topic of conversation – terrible man to have in a round when its last orders. Apparently he is old but for fucks sake everyone in the West looks that ancient. Had something to do with Macnas, for that alone he should be flogged. Likes U2, also deserving of a flogging. On a positive note, he does write poetry but, lets face it, most of it is pure shite.
Martin McGuinness
Peacemaker, so should be blessed. Has an immediate advantage in that he is used to taking oaths. Lost his P45 from the Army Council so is not too sure when exactly he resigned. The only one to show any decorum in taking all the shite that has been hurled at him and that has been a lot of shite from just about all parts of society and the media. Can talk to Peter Robinson – without feeling the need to punch his lights out. Major fault – supports Derry City.
David Norris
The camp, comic candidate. The mellifluous scholar rarely uses one word when a combined dictionary and thesaraus can be shoe horned into a sound-bite. He is, famously, a man of letters – none of which he can use in single syllable words. Like Michael D, he has published poetry, none of which anyone has ever read, not even himself. He left the Presidential race early to stamp his feet and sulk in the corner. After finding the attention he was looking for Norris re-entered the race where everyone promptly ignored him. Has worn cravats. Likes fried liver.
Mary Davis
The lady in red, an appropriate colour considering the state of the economy. Can’t open her mouth without saying Special Olympics. Been on more boards than Greg Louganis. Not unfamiliar with the airbrush. Thinks that Denis O’Brien is a suitable person for membership of the Council of State. Nuff said.
Gay Mitchell
No, there won’t be a gay up the Aras. Mitchell is the angriest man in politics, liable to take offence at the most trivial detail – he is rude and obnoxious and they’re just his good qualities. Overall a complete dick. Even his own party hates him. I admit to previous with Mitchell, he was invited to speak at a residents meeting opposed to high-rise development in Dublin 12 and called me a shinner – now I’ve been many things and been called many things but a shinner? Think Buzz might be tickled by that. Mitchell is advised by Terri Prone (a communications expert, apparently) who possibly should be sacked. He thinks the Presidential office requires someone with dignity, diplomacy and tact so that rules him out.
Dana
Professional Catholic. Holds no truck with abortion, gay marriage or trucks. Afraid to ask her brother about his, em, difficulties. Breda O’Brien, from the even more reactionary wing of Catholicism thinks that she should withdraw from the race and with friends like that… Might be interesting to see what the other member of the Irish Catholic Trinity- John Waters – thinks, then again, life’s too fucking short. I’m resisting the temptation to throw in an obvious reference to all kinds of everything when she is, in fact, no kind of anything. Possibly should be sectioned.
So there you have it, one of the most insipid line-ups ever for an election to the supposed highest post in the land. The only saving grace is that Gay Byrne isn’t in the race, I think that would finish us off for good. There should possibly be an eighth option – none of the above, lets do without a President for a while and see if the sky falls in. We are a bankrupt country economically, morally and politically and if this is the best we can do then we are truly fucked. You might want to go and lie down for the next seven years.
So a High Court Judge has ruled that Ivor should be awarded €17,000 in lost earnings. I wonder is that based on his Cork or Dublin homes? And how did the protesters who delivered a snake to his house know which one to go to?
So, we have an ex-Finance Minister and current Taoiseach (that’s Irish for incompetent buffoon) who claims that in accompanying Sean Fitzpatrick in 18 holes of golf and an 18 course dinner he never once discussed the malaise at Anglo-Irish bank. If you accept that barely believable premise then the question is – why the fuck didn’t he discuss the situation? Or more importantly, why didn’t he wrap a five-iron round Fitzy’s neck for breaking our whole economy? And nice to see Fitzy’s old friend Drumm backing him up.
Watching the hubris coming from the Peter Griffinpress conference this evening has made me angrier than an All Black hooker accused of a headbutt. Its bad enough that he, Bertie and the previous inept idiots as Ministers for Finance ran a coach and four through our economy but now he has the audacity to say that his budget and his four-year plan must be passed before he will even think about seeking a mandate from the people.We should be the ones to decide what sort of budget we are going to suffer. Nothing that Griffin has done or said has been in the “national interest”, it’s all just to keep him and his party of nepotistic crooks in office.
Fianna Fail have treated us like dirt for too long now and its time we stood up and gave them a good kicking. They should be forced to go if they won’t do it voluntarily. As we seem to be heading back to the bad old days of the 80s, lets at least bring back the anger and energy that was evident in Toxteth and Notting Hill when Thatcher was destroying her country. For too long the citizens of this state have been passive victims of a Progressive Democrat/Fianna Fail philosophy that has just about destroyed everything good about our society. We need new political thinking in this country but that means we, as citizens, have to play an active part. Its time to reclaim what we’ve lost and if they won’t go gently into the good night maybe its time for an old fashioned riot…
If anyone can be bothered, Morgan Jones, is having a silent and peaceful protest outside the Dail at 12 noon on Thursday 25th. Personally, I would be inclined to bring a big stick and a bag of rocks but maybe we start silent and build up to something a bit stronger. As Shane Hegarty put it: Brian Cowen appears to be playing a political game of chicken. And we’re all passengers in the car.
I wonder if Conor Pope could help these folks or would he just tell them that it’s a case of caveat emptor? The most striking thing about the case is that you can actually buy sperm that is labelled “Caucasian (Cape Coloured)”. Did the couple from Northern Ireland go all the way to South Africa for their sperm? Could they not have found some Aryan sperm around the Baltics? Maybe after losing the court case they could get a sponsorship deal with Dulux.
I just wonder if the parents are concerned about their two children or are they more worried about their skin colour and how that will be perceived in their community? I mean, it’s not as if there is any guarantee when it comes to artificial (or non-artificial) insemination that children will be born a certain colour, sex, with all limbs, with particular hair or eye colour. Its pretty much pot luck and genes do have a tendency to pop up, even after many generations, and say hello. We are all children of Africa, with common ancestors in the Rift Valley in East Africa (despite what some rabid American preachers and friends of the Minister for Science might think).
If the kids weren’t aware that their conception was a little different to their peers then they should be told so and given a chance to face up to whatever difficulties that arise. If it is true that the children are suffering from racism then that says a lot about the narrow-minded bigotry that is still so apparent on this island and that is something for all of us to deal with.
Judges have always been a law unto themselves – pun intended and Gombeen Man has exposed a few of the more idiotic goings on in courts around the country. Another to add to the list is the Honourable (?) Judge Donagh McDonagh (I’m always wary of those that have the same first and last names).
The venerable judge sat in the case of Garda Gerard Curtis, accused of using excessive force against John Paul Maughan, a Dublin scumbag, following a high-speed car chase. The brave Garda smashed the windows of the car and dragged said scumbag out before laying into him with a baton. Now, whatever about the scumbag deserving a kicking instead of a trial, it is surely up to the brave Garda to show restraint when in possession of a weapon rather than using it to tenderise fleeing suspects.
The judge ordered that the jury in the case acquit the brave Garda because the prosecution had “failed to disprove the accused was acting in self-defence when he hit the suspect with his baton.” What a great example of using words to confuse. Was it not up to the brave Garda to prove that he had acted in self-defence? After all, that is what would happen if you or I decided to take a stick to a scumbag. His Honour equated the assault by the brave Garda to that inflicted on Rodney King by members of the brave LA police force. Even more bizarrely, the judge also said, after viewing CCTV footage, “[t]his to me is a case of a single Garda overreacting.” He went on to castigate the 15 colleagues of the brave Garda for being partisan and maybe not being entirely truthful as to the facts of the beating. So, the brave Garda is ordered to be acquitted even though the judge thought that he used excessive force, nice use of one arm of the state to protect another.
If it’s good enough for Bobby Alyward its good enough for Cork Fine Gael TD, PJ Sheehan. It all comes back to the culture of the rural redneck downing his pints and piling into his motor to weave his weary way home. After all, its his god-given (or was it De Valera?) right as a daycent skin and salt of the earth gombeen to do what the feck he likes. And not only that, as an elected official it’s practically his duty to abuse the subsidised bar and then abuse the cop that tries to prevent him exercising his full rights as a higher Power (prefer Jameson myself).
What the whole unedifying spectacle shows is that deference to politicians is still alive and well among the police force. The lady in blue should have arrested the ignorant old twat and slapped him in the slammer overnight. If only there was an independent witness present on that 8th July night that could corroborate what actually happened and back up the cop in question.
But wait, there was someone and that someone is a well-respected party leader who decries politicians abusing their positions or gaining favours just because of what they are. Step forward Enda Kenny, PJ’s boss, who immediately leaped to the defence of…PJ Sheehan by telling the policewoman to ignore what Sheehan had said about ruining her career. And Kenny wasted absolutely no time at all (whats two months in politics?) by asking Sheehan to reflect on his own position. Of course, Kenny was in no way influenced to act by the leaked police report into the whole affair.
This is the quick, decisive and unblinkered leadership that the country is calling out for. Its enough to make you cry – or emigrate.
Did Fianna Fail evolve from the Sinn Fein party of 1905? Are the Lenihan family an example of Survival of the Fittest at play in the political world or just some sort of horrific genetic mutation? Is Charles Haughey a Missing Link? These questions could have been answered this evening by Conor Lenihan, Minister for Pseudoscience, Irrationality and Superstition at the book launch of The Origin of Specious Nonsense, by his good friend and constituent, John J. May.
Alas, it emerged late last night that Lenihan has pulled out of the launch. Perhaps he’d had enough of dealing with the unevolved at the Fianna Fail “think”-in down in Galway at the weekend. This is a pity as I’m sure the intellectual heavyweight that is Lenihan would have had all the facts at hand (or opposable thumb) to destroy the non-scientific arguments put forward by May.
And in a startling attempt to show that the Neanderthals didn’t actually become extinct, our glorious leader might have turned up pissed on Morning Ireland today. Of course, its our fault that we elect these primates. Maybe we’re not as evolved as we’d like to think.
So Fingers Fingleton is showing a bit of remorse for the way the Irish economy has gone down the toilet. Of course, you won’t hear the word ‘responsibility’ from the odious little toad. Nor will you hear him admit that the Irish Nationwide did anything wrong when it hid money that Anglo-Irish Bank was paying to its directors. This is the guy who oversaw a €280m loss at the building society before retiring on a pension worth €27.6m and who got a very handsome golden handjob of €1m, which Irish Nationwide is now trying to claim back. This is the guy who was at the helm of a massive money lending operation to Irish developers that is going to cost the taxpayer in excess of €3b.
